Some how I have made it to almost week 8 of the nursing program, almost
half way! I couldn't explain to you how I have made it this far with all the
obstacles I've had to over come. But, I always know that I am not in this boat
alone and it should be somewhat normal to have these feelings, right?
It all begins with the shock you get when you first start. I remember
looking at my class schedule thinking how unethical it was to be in class for ten
hours straight. Adapting to these long, challenging schedules was an obstacle
in it self. You have to push your family and jobs aside, which to me are very
important and hard to let go, to just make it through the present week. Once I
adapted, which I am still in the process of doing, I am able to remind myself
that this has been my dream since I was a little girl and my family will always
be there. The whole beginning almost seems too surreal, and I still don't know
how I made it through but somehow, I made it.
Once you finally adept to that and are going through the motions of all
of it, you’re presented at least weekly with your breaking point. For me, this
involves a lot of crying (kind of like this picture) and giving myself a pep talk to calm myself down. It
usually happens before the night of the big exams when you couldn't dare
yourself to read another fifty pages or go over my mountain-high stack of flash
cards. This has to be the biggest lesson I've learned thus far in the program.
No longer can you cram the night before and pray that you get a reasonable
grade, nope not anymore. The breakdowns have subsided and can now put that
energy toward studying harder and earning better grades.
Finally, my last, and hardest, obstacle is
believing in myself. There have been countless times when I have felt like I
could not complete all the assignments on time or study for one more
minute after studying for three days straight. This is by far my biggest
challenge. Luckily, whenever I’m having this problem, there is always something
showing me that I am capable. Whether it is receiving a good grade or my peers
encouraging me that I can do it and its normal to be feeling this way, either
way it’s a blessing. I feel that this will always be a struggle for me
throughout the program, but I hope that by the end I can realize how far I have
actually come and that it was all done through me.